March 28, Respect Your Cat Day

Greetings, humble human readers. It is I, Marvelous, esteemed feline, household sovereign (smack! Jo Jo says I am a CO-Sovereign), and connoisseur of treats.

I have recently uncovered a most astonishing piece of human history — one that proves what I’ve always suspected: Humans have long needed official instructions on how to behave properly toward cats.

Let me tell you the tale…
March 28, 1384 — When a King Finally Got Something Right
According to several human sources, on this very date, King Richard II of England issued an edict forbidding people from eating cats. Yes, you read that correctly. Humans needed a law to stop them from nibbling on us. 

 Apparently, in those medieval days, some humans were so hungry (and so poorly supervised by cats) that they ATE felines. The King’s decree put an end to this dreadful practice and marked a shift toward recognizing our value as companions, mousers, and majestic beings.

Some modern humans even believe this edict is the origin of Respect Your Cat Day, celebrated every March 28th.

My Interpretation, Naturally More Accurate Than Any Human Historian’s

Imagine it: I, Marvelous, lounging on a velvet cushion in the royal court, giving King Richard II the Look. You know the LOOK - the slow blink of judgment mixed with disappointment.
And the King, realizing the error of his people’s ways, rises and proclaims:

“Hear ye, hear ye! Let it be known throughout the realm:
No one shall eat the cats.  
They are too noble, too clever, too essential…
and frankly, they’re watching us.”

Thus, the decree was made. And humanity took one tiny step toward proper feline reverence.

Why This Matters (According to Me, Marvelous)

It proves humans have always needed guidance.

It explains why March 28th is now a day dedicated to respecting us (as it should be every day).

And it gives me, Marvelous, an excellent historical justification for demanding extra treats on that date.

Official Proclamation

By order of Marvelous the Magnificent, Supreme Ruler of Sunbeams, Guardian of the Treat Cupboard, & Benevolent Overseer of All Humans

I hereby command that all cats shall be respected, revered, and properly adored.

Humans shall:

Provide snacks upon request (and sometimes without request).

Maintain warm laps for seasonal lounging.

Offer chin scratches with appropriate technique.

Never disturb a sleeping cat for frivolous reasons.

Recognize that all surfaces are, by default, cat property.

Failure to comply will result in: The Look.  

(You know the one.)

Thus is my will. Thus shall it be.